Despite crap production value and spending all of 15 minutes creating it, we here at LakehillUnited.Blogspot are pleased to bring you the world premiere of Holla's Movember MOvie: Movember 2011: The Story of a Mo.
Enjoy....and if you don't please don't tell us.
Dang I'm handsome....Holla out!
Wednesday, 30 November 2011
Seattle was Bonkers! Lions Win the Grey Cup! Oh Yeah, There was Also Some Soccer...
On a weekend that was overshadowed by the exploits of many United members south of the border, it may come as a surprise that there was a match to be played versus Bays at the Foot.
And while United kept a bit of a streak alive by not losing, they were held to yet another 1-1 draw which has become the hallmark of the campaign thus far.
The opponent this game was a Bays team that has not had overly strong results in the division this term. United themselves looked a bit ragged out on the pitch as perhaps some players had an eye on events predicated after the game, or perhaps the lackadaisical practice schedule was catching up on them. You know what they say: "Tis the season to avoid the weather and go to the pub!"
The air was cold at Braefoot on Friday night and United took to the pitch in a 4-3-3 formation. Bays were set up to pressure the United midfield but United held possession comfortably for most of the match at the back as Benny "Slinky" Stanchfield and Ryan "Twister" Braun settled early and organised well.
In the midfield, Sam "Hungry Hungry Hippo" Yager and Ian "Battleship" Broome were effective at breaking up the Bays attacks while the game itself proved to be a battle of attrition.
The first half was relatively uneventful with United unable to translate strong defence at the back into chances at the front. Bays, too, had little to write home about but did hit the outside of the woodwork on a rare chance.
The second half saw United make a slight change to their personnel by swapping Mani "Yahtzee" Bains and Broome with hope of more direct running at the Bays back line. While Broome did a good job of closing the back line, United were still unable to really threaten the Bays goal.
United - might be in trouble when they start relying on this guy...
Ultimately United would get caught on a freak goal as the ball bounced in their area and Bays did well to get a good finish in.
With time still left on the clock, United had a go at Bays and made life more difficult for their opponents. There were several runs into the Bays box which were unable to find the right finish but eventually the pressure paid off.
Chris "Cabbage Patch" Woodcock (yes that Chris Woodcock) found the ball at his feet after a bit of a scramble in the box and stabbed it home to tie the match.
Woodcock - did you think we would use a different pic?
That's the way the game ended with United unable to find the win and the three points. The tie was the fifth of the season and leaves United in fifth place with two games at hand. Next match is this Friday against Gordon Head Blue followed by the Christmas and Festivus party at Butch's place.
Man of the Match: Tough to remember but I think it was Kielan - he did have a fine game and some pretty nice abs. Special mention to Joey "The Body" Ventura for making his debut in net and having a great game.
Holle-Nash Pecan-Doodles Award: Troy "Dukes of Hazzard" Taillefer
Moan of the Match: Another tie....
Saturday, 26 November 2011
What's Going on There!!?? Inside the Player's Minds - Troy Taillefer
In the continuing series here on LakehillUnited.Blogspot, we endeavor to bring you inside the minds of some of our United players this year.
Either through picture, video, or spoken word, we'll gather the intel on your favourite United players (and perhaps staff) and present it to you - right here on LakehillUnited.Blogspot.
Today, we bring you the following clip from United defender Troy Taillefer. Taillefer, and avid lawyer and collector of artifacts is perhaps best known for his mystic powers.
But today, he decided to introduce us all to the Guy on the Buffalo...
Either through picture, video, or spoken word, we'll gather the intel on your favourite United players (and perhaps staff) and present it to you - right here on LakehillUnited.Blogspot.
Today, we bring you the following clip from United defender Troy Taillefer. Taillefer, and avid lawyer and collector of artifacts is perhaps best known for his mystic powers.
But today, he decided to introduce us all to the Guy on the Buffalo...
Guy on a Buffalo - part 1
Now normally we would just leave it by posting the requested submission but this video is so good, we decided to link the rest of the series. Enjoy and stay tuned for more What's Going on There!!??
A Very Late Congratulations to Lakehill United's Newest Member!!!!
LakehillUnited.Blogspot would like to congratulate Vinnie and Saija Poldrugova [Smith] on the birth of their son, Kaeden.
Baby Kaeden arrived on the morning of November 9th to a very proud mom and pops. It's only a matter of time now before you have to deal with this:
Congrats Vinnie, you're no longer the shortest in the family.
Baby Kaeden arrived on the morning of November 9th to a very proud mom and pops. It's only a matter of time now before you have to deal with this:
Action starts in the 40th second...
Saturday, 19 November 2011
sNOw Game Played in Nanaimo as United Get Postponed!
Due to frigid like conditions and frosty white stuff falling from the sky, the City of Nanaimo declared a Snow Day today.
The good news for United is that they were able to take the weekend off. The bad news is that it didn't snow on the Lower Island. That didn't stop some United members from heading north to enjoy the cold stuff (as seen below).
The good news for United is that they were able to take the weekend off. The bad news is that it didn't snow on the Lower Island. That didn't stop some United members from heading north to enjoy the cold stuff (as seen below).
Many believe incorrectly that JoePa made Scottie wear the pink snow suit...
Good weekend boys, that deserves a good Tebow-ing!
Tosh.O tells it like it is...and then gets carried away...
Enjoy your weekend and we'll see you next week for Bays!
Tuesday, 8 November 2011
Beer Master - Victoria Draught Champion Coaching For United!
In what can only be described as stagnant material, Coach Holla was semi-recently crowned the Stella Artois Draught Master Champion of the Monkey Tree!
The premise was simple: pour a Stella Artois according to the 9 steps of pouring draught Stella. The best pour wins a trip to Vancouver and a chance to become the Canadian Draught Master!
The premise was simple: pour a Stella Artois according to the 9 steps of pouring draught Stella. The best pour wins a trip to Vancouver and a chance to become the Canadian Draught Master!
The Nine Steps - As they are supposed to be done.
Holla naturally won the competition but waived the right to go to Vancouver citing "free beer" as the reason for entering in the contest in the first place.
The winning performance
Fortunately for readers of LakehillUnited.Blogspot, the winning performance was captured on video by budding amateur cinematographer, Chris "I'll Film Anything But Porn" Woodcock.
In parting, Holla would like to share the following wisdom: "Enjoy your beer and may all your measurements be two-fingered ones!"
Sunday, 6 November 2011
Mystic Master Predicts Thriller in Ganges: United Hotter than a Pistol at Portlock!
In a game that has become an instant classic, United beat second place Salt Spring Island 4-3 in a thriller on Saturday afternoon.
It was an anything but predictable affair, yet somehow United hotshot Troy "Miss Sally" Taillefer foresaw the proceedings before the first ball was kicked; predicting a 4-3 outcome in the afternoon's game.
The air was cold and crisp as United took to the field at Portlock Park on Salt Spring Island on Saturday. There were a few changes as United were missing a few bodies, but overall United were still strong as they lined up against the islanders.
And it didn't take long for United to make the breakthrough as Joey "My Pants are Sweaty" Ventura was viciously taken down in the box with no more than 2 minutes up on the clock. Jeff "Stitches" Lenton stepped up and slotted home the resulting penalty, despite the keeper getting half a hand to it.
From there, United took control for long periods of the first half with some sumptuous football. The passing was brilliant and the link-up play between Mani "Shout, Shout, Let it All Out" Bains and Chris "Bananarama" Woodcock was some of the best seen all season.
But against the run of play, midway through the first half, it was the Islanders that leveled. A mis-timed challenge allowed the Salt Spring forward a half chance on net and he did well to beat Mike "Baby Gerber" Peters in the United net.
At 1-1, United were put under some sustained pressure and at the end of the half, conceded from a corner to allow the Islanders the 2-1 lead heading into the the break.
The message was simple at half from coach Holla: "Take your chances, we're the better team...I like dancing hip-hop and colouring!!!"
Despite the dynamite pep talk, United were at sixes and sevens to begin the half and not long after conceded a third in diabolical fashion.
3-1 down, away from home, arctic-like conditions, no Vinnie Smith; United could be forgiven for thinking there was no way back.... but not on this day as 15 boys went to Salt Spring Island on Saturday, and came back men (please, no sheep jokes).
The goal galvanized United. In what can only be described as a game for the ages, United dug deep and took advantage of a tiring, and in some cases appeared to be having serious chest pains, Salt Spring team.
Lenton lead the charge like a man possessed. His dangles were so dangly, that even Kim Kardashian would have been jealous...
Lenton's partner in the midfield, Sam "Chiu" Yager was commanding and Bains grew in stature as the game progressed.
United played some spellbinding football as they turned the screw on the fading Islanders. It was Bains who would strike first after seeing an effort deflect straight back to him at the top of the box; he made no mistake on the second effort as he hit a frozen rope into the back of the net. The goalie stood no chance.
3-2 Game on!!!!
United continued to press as they sensed a point was there for the taking. They were rewarded for their hard work as Woodcock lasered a second at the near post in the 80th minute.
With under 10 minutes left though, Lenton fell victim to a nasty challenge. A collision with a Salt Spring Island player left Jeff with a nasty gash on his head. With blood pouring out of his eyebrow, Lenton had to be helped from the field. Special mention to Joey V. for taking him to the hospital where he received some of that legendary Salt Spring Island craft work in the form of several stitches.
Perhaps it was the crispness of the day, or the flagging of the opposition; or perhaps it was the smell of blood on the field that prompted United to go for it - we may never know. Under the circumstances, a point would have been a good result.
But United don't do good...
THEY DO RAD TO THE POWER OF SICK!!!!!!
In the dying moments of the game, the day was to be United's. Woodcock, with some excellent work up front, proved too much for the opposition defence. A quick move saw him create a little space to shoot but before he could get his shot off, he was pulled to the ground...
PENALTY!!!!!
Was it to be? Could Taillefer's prediction come true? Could the circle now be complete? Who is Nash's father?
Yager came forward and stroked the PK home giving United the 3 points and a well-deserved victory.
And so the vision came true and United could ride home with a beer in their bellies and a grin in their hearts.
Asked what other predictions he had after the match, Taillefer's response was understated: "I predict a game this Friday against the Gorge." Well played sir, well played.
Man of the Match: Mani Bains
Honourable mention to Ryan Braun for man-handling his check several times.
Holle-Nash Ruby Red Slippers Award: Jeff Lenton for probably wishing he was at home.
Moan of the Match: Many dudes, single shower.
It was an anything but predictable affair, yet somehow United hotshot Troy "Miss Sally" Taillefer foresaw the proceedings before the first ball was kicked; predicting a 4-3 outcome in the afternoon's game.
Taillefer - Must have ESPN
The air was cold and crisp as United took to the field at Portlock Park on Salt Spring Island on Saturday. There were a few changes as United were missing a few bodies, but overall United were still strong as they lined up against the islanders.
And it didn't take long for United to make the breakthrough as Joey "My Pants are Sweaty" Ventura was viciously taken down in the box with no more than 2 minutes up on the clock. Jeff "Stitches" Lenton stepped up and slotted home the resulting penalty, despite the keeper getting half a hand to it.
From there, United took control for long periods of the first half with some sumptuous football. The passing was brilliant and the link-up play between Mani "Shout, Shout, Let it All Out" Bains and Chris "Bananarama" Woodcock was some of the best seen all season.
But against the run of play, midway through the first half, it was the Islanders that leveled. A mis-timed challenge allowed the Salt Spring forward a half chance on net and he did well to beat Mike "Baby Gerber" Peters in the United net.
At 1-1, United were put under some sustained pressure and at the end of the half, conceded from a corner to allow the Islanders the 2-1 lead heading into the the break.
The message was simple at half from coach Holla: "Take your chances, we're the better team...I like dancing hip-hop and colouring!!!"
Holla's half time talk - the same only different
Despite the dynamite pep talk, United were at sixes and sevens to begin the half and not long after conceded a third in diabolical fashion.
3-1 down, away from home, arctic-like conditions, no Vinnie Smith; United could be forgiven for thinking there was no way back.... but not on this day as 15 boys went to Salt Spring Island on Saturday, and came back men (please, no sheep jokes).
The goal galvanized United. In what can only be described as a game for the ages, United dug deep and took advantage of a tiring, and in some cases appeared to be having serious chest pains, Salt Spring team.
Lenton lead the charge like a man possessed. His dangles were so dangly, that even Kim Kardashian would have been jealous...
Kardashian, pretty dangly earrings
Lenton's partner in the midfield, Sam "Chiu" Yager was commanding and Bains grew in stature as the game progressed.
United played some spellbinding football as they turned the screw on the fading Islanders. It was Bains who would strike first after seeing an effort deflect straight back to him at the top of the box; he made no mistake on the second effort as he hit a frozen rope into the back of the net. The goalie stood no chance.
3-2 Game on!!!!
United continued to press as they sensed a point was there for the taking. They were rewarded for their hard work as Woodcock lasered a second at the near post in the 80th minute.
Woodcock - Happy to be so handsome and back in the goals
With under 10 minutes left though, Lenton fell victim to a nasty challenge. A collision with a Salt Spring Island player left Jeff with a nasty gash on his head. With blood pouring out of his eyebrow, Lenton had to be helped from the field. Special mention to Joey V. for taking him to the hospital where he received some of that legendary Salt Spring Island craft work in the form of several stitches.
Perhaps it was the crispness of the day, or the flagging of the opposition; or perhaps it was the smell of blood on the field that prompted United to go for it - we may never know. Under the circumstances, a point would have been a good result.
But United don't do good...
THEY DO RAD TO THE POWER OF SICK!!!!!!
In the dying moments of the game, the day was to be United's. Woodcock, with some excellent work up front, proved too much for the opposition defence. A quick move saw him create a little space to shoot but before he could get his shot off, he was pulled to the ground...
PENALTY!!!!!
Was it to be? Could Taillefer's prediction come true? Could the circle now be complete? Who is Nash's father?
Yager came forward and stroked the PK home giving United the 3 points and a well-deserved victory.
And so the vision came true and United could ride home with a beer in their bellies and a grin in their hearts.
Asked what other predictions he had after the match, Taillefer's response was understated: "I predict a game this Friday against the Gorge." Well played sir, well played.
Man of the Match: Mani Bains
Honourable mention to Ryan Braun for man-handling his check several times.
Holle-Nash Ruby Red Slippers Award: Jeff Lenton for probably wishing he was at home.
Moan of the Match: Many dudes, single shower.
Wednesday, 2 November 2011
United Gamble with Cowichan to a 0-0 Draw
On a Saturday at Braefoot, against a team from up-island
United took the field, in a four-four-two
The backline looked solid, the keeper a banana
The mids pinned by Jeffrey Lents, and a guy named “E”
Up front we had the Bibo, whose size was only lessened
By the massive defence, of Cowichan
The game started soundly, and United looked quite strong
Creating chances going forward, with balls of long
The backline was tested, and on occasion they were breached
But the banana was having a decent game, nothing out of his reach
As the first half progressed, the game was finely balanced
Neither team the breakthrough, that would earn three points
And as the half concluded, an errant cross was fisted
The ball was clearly dealt with, along with Boomer’s head
A woozy figure lay there, his job done in this game
He staggered to the showers, not knowing his name
And the halftime talk was:
“You’ve got to know when to hold it
Know when to pass it
Know when to cross the ball
Know when to run
You never dribble the ball
When you’re clearly under pressure
There’ll be time enough for dribbling
When the beer is gone”
Gamble this Kenny!!!!
Now every player knows, the secret to winning
Is scoring more goals, then the other team
Lakehill started brightly, and put their opponents under pressure
But couldn’t get the ball in the net, to win the game
Woodcock was busy, and Mani won the ball a lot
Vinnie tried to beat his man, with his words
Now Yager was quite yelly, Boner was tall and firm
And Joey kept it soccery, when he got in the game
And as the game wound down, United released a weapon
His ball “hand”ling second to none, his hair a hue of green?
Now the game was almost up, but Kones couldn’t change it
A point even – the game drawn, as the sunshine set
So United drew Cowichan, on the 29th of October
The Year of our Lord, 2011
Dances With Wolves, is Rimek’s favourite movie
I didn’t have enough verses, to finish this song
And the Stanch said:
“You’ve got to know when to hold it
Know when to pass it
Know when to cross the ball
Know when to run
You never dribble the ball
When you’re clearly under pressure
There’ll be time enough for dribbling
When the beer is gone”
Man of the Match: Peters was sensational
Holle-Nash: None awarded meaning it could be a triple shot at the next game!
Moan of the Match: "Boomer it's Saturday and you're playing soccer..."
Special mention to Smash and Bash Yager for rearranging Rimek's bumper
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