United Gamble with Cowichan to a 0-0 Draw

On a Saturday at Braefoot, against a team from up-island

United took the field, in a four-four-two

The backline looked solid, the keeper a banana

The mids pinned by Jeffrey Lents, and a guy named “E”

Up front we had the Bibo, whose size was only lessened

By the massive defence, of Cowichan

The game started soundly, and United looked quite strong

Creating chances going forward, with balls of long

The backline was tested, and on occasion they were breached

But the banana was having a decent game, nothing out of his reach

As the first half progressed, the game was finely balanced

Neither team the breakthrough, that would earn three points

And as the half concluded, an errant cross was fisted

The ball was clearly dealt with, along with Boomer’s head

A woozy figure lay there, his job done in this game

He staggered to the showers, not knowing his name

And the halftime talk was:

“You’ve got to know when to hold it

Know when to pass it

Know when to cross the ball

Know when to run

You never dribble the ball

When you’re clearly under pressure

There’ll be time enough for dribbling

When the beer is gone”

Gamble this Kenny!!!!

Now every player knows, the secret to winning

Is scoring more goals, then the other team

Lakehill started brightly, and put their opponents under pressure

But couldn’t get the ball in the net, to win the game

Woodcock was busy, and Mani won the ball a lot

Vinnie tried to beat his man, with his words

Now Yager was quite yelly, Boner was tall and firm

And Joey kept it soccery, when he got in the game

And as the game wound down, United released a weapon

His ball “hand”ling second to none, his hair a hue of green?

Now the game was almost up, but Kones couldn’t change it

A point even – the game drawn, as the sunshine set

So United drew Cowichan, on the 29^th of October

The Year of our Lord, 2011

Dances With Wolves, is Rimek’s favourite movie

I didn’t have enough verses, to finish this song

And the Stanch said:

“You’ve got to know when to hold it

Know when to pass it

Know when to cross the ball

Know when to run

You never dribble the ball

When you’re clearly under pressure

There’ll be time enough for dribbling

When the beer is gone”

Man of the Match: Peters was sensational

Holle-Nash: None awarded meaning it could be a triple shot at the next game!

Moan of the Match: "Boomer it's Saturday and you're playing soccer..." 

Special mention to Smash and Bash Yager for rearranging Rimek's bumper